Ultimate Frisbee game particularly “ultimate”
AUSTIN—Players of the regularly scheduled Wednesday night game of Ultimate Frisbee noted after the game that this week’s match was, for some reason or another, particularly “ultimate.” While none of the players could describe what was different about this game, they unanimously agreed that it was much more “ultimate” than usual. “I don’t really know how else to describe it,” said James Langley, one of the players in the game. “It was just exceedingly ultimate—like, there was a mind-blowing amount of ultimate in it.” After the game, the players walked past a game of Frisbee Golf and commented on all of the ways in which it was not “ultimate.”
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• My bowels move like Jagger.
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• J. Edgar is about vacuums, right?
• I’m allergic to fire. I break out in agony.
• This is not a Beauty and the Beast themed party, that is my menorah.
• It’s like wine, only cooler!
• If you’re going to practice safe sex, make sure to remember the combination.
• Hey there hottie, want to take a look at my restricted network?
• Blackboard, your name doesn’t even make sense.
• Okay. Best pregnancy scare story. Go!
• Looks like I’ll be taking a course at ACC again.
• Google calendars should really have a party o’clock option.
• NBA players will refuse Kim Kardashian’s offers, resulting in a second lockout.
• Tragedy could have been avoided if everyone hadn’t updated their Facebook status before helping.
• For a TA you know an awful lot about this subject.
• Have you heard the NPR special on loneliness?
• This reggae song sounds the same when I’m high. MYTH: BUSTED.
• Did you catch Video Game Hour Live last night? Ok, I won’t spoil it.
• Coming this fall: Sassy Dude Dying Of Cancer starring Seth Rogen
• Sex is on my mind. GROSS! getitoffgetitoffgetitoff.
• Sorry hun, I’ve got Appletini-dick.
• Austin may not have produced Paranormal Activity 3, but it will promote the hell out of it. #AFF
• I’m glad we found el Dorado because I’m very partial about my tortilla chips.
• My dealer called it “Blue Dream,” but I’m pretty sure they call everything that.
• Qdoba: Chipotle of the night
• The six-hundred word cover article about campus bathrooms will highlight the questionable value ofthe Daily Texan.
• Your gay friend has been in the closet a long time, but that’s probably because he has a lot of clothes to choose from.
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