Of course class did the assigned reading

These are the best students at UT. Photo Texas Travesty

CAMPUS—Of course students in Professor Lawrence Stein’s E316K class did the assigned reading, according to various students who showed up to the class today.

Professor Stein was skeptical that the entirety of the class would read the 120-page assignment over the controversial demographic shifts of indigenous tribes of Guinea-Bissea  in the post-WWII era. After conducting a quick poll that asked students to raise their hand if they had read the article, Stein was pleased that every student in the class had done so.

“I am quite impressed,” said Stein to the class of responsible students who read every last word of the required reading. “I thought many of you would have skimmed it at best.”

Stein then began to field comments on the reading from the class full of beaming students.

“Yeah, I especially liked the part about the battles they were having with one another, like in the 60s and stuff,” explained biology sophomore Jeremy Mendoza as he quickly glanced over the article he definitely spent 6 hours reading last night. “It was super interesting and probably the best thing I’ve read in a
long time.”

Mechanical engineering junior Brad Walker took offense at the professor’s skepticism, saying that whenever an instructor assigns a lengthy reading as homework he makes sure it becomes his number one priority before the next class meets.

“Last night I ordered a pizza, bought some beer, and invited some friends over to watch the NBA Playoffs,” said Walker. “But when I remembered the professor assigned this reading for today’s class, I said, ‘Screw that stuff; there’s nothing I‘d rather do than stay up all night reading about the disparagement of the Haikai tribe in Northern Guinea.’”

Professor Stein was so happy with the progress of the class that he called upon marketing senior Jennifer Hastings to go to the chalkboard and draw a map of the tribal boundaries of Guinea-Bissea during the coup d’etat of 1976.

“Well, my interpretation of the reading puts the dominant Tokaia tribe somewhere in this region, the mid-central province of the Afro-Euro-Asian region,” said Hastings as she drew a circle around the entire Eastern Hemisphere. “From the reading I learned that there is a lot of scholarly debate about the subject.”

Because of the incredible interest that his class has shown in the subject, Professor Stein has asked his students to divide into groups and prepare a presentation on the cultural significance of the demographic shifts in Guinea-Bissea. When polling the class to see if it was a good idea, there were no objections.

“I’m glad that the entire class read this article, because if we hadn’t, that would make this project extremely difficult and time-consuming,” explained public relations freshman Lauren Stovall. “I can’t wait to get started.”