Rousing Rabble at the University of Texas at Austin Since 1997
Don’t hate the player, hate the patriarchal social norms
by Michael Worthington, White Man
Whoa, whoa, whoa missy. I saw that look you just gave me when I rolled up in my 2011 BMW M3 and took your parking spot. Before you start going off about what a smug asshole I am, let me just say this: Don’t hate the player, hate the society that gives you no chance of ever measuring up to me.
Oh sure, I guess I’m supposed to apologize for the fact that my preternaturally good hair and firm handshake makes me a better candidate for a promotion over your “experience.” Or maybe you’d like me to express regret that you have absolutely no chance at being taken seriously by a mechanic. Listen, sugartits, you can stand here all day whining about how I’m an irredeemable prick but honestly, I’ve stopped listening to people like you ever since I got my six-figure consulting job right after college. It’s amazing what opportunities pop up when your dad plays in the “Goldman Sachs CEO Scramble” charity golf tournament. Oh, your father died from black lung disease? Then write your senator or something, Jesus.
Look, as much as I would love to begin every one of my business lunches explaining how my white, upper-class background affords me privileges that people like you will never experience, frankly I’m too busy getting drunk on my expense account. Yes, of course I’m familiar with Pateman’s assertion of gender roles acting simply as social constructions to reinforce political subjugation. Sure, I agree Pateman was one of our generation’s foremost feminist theorists, but you know what else she was? A woman. So riddle me that.
I’m sensing this hostility is somehow related to the fact that you don’t think political efficacy and the ability to pee standing up should be correlated. But let’s be real, if you stopped spending so much time being a marginalized group and started working on growing a Y chromosome we wouldn’t have these problems. Now where’s my dry cleaning?
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2 Comments
You say “don’t hate the player, hate the patriarchal society”
I say, “Silence is just another way to say ‘I agree’”
i wish this was so != true that it was funny…