CAMPUS—It was revealed Tuesday that Kaylen Shimlathy, an attention whore who contributes excessively to class discussion, is also sleeping with two TAs and the professor. Shimlathy, the recognition slut in question, prolonged the lecture by explaining her father's view on the issues and shouting out responses to rhetorical questions. She then followed the professor back to his office after class and had intercourse with him on his desk. Shimlathy's promiscuity has been linked to her constant need for approval and her ambitions for the future. "I want to make sure that I glean the most I can out of these classes to ensure I am prepared to enter the workforce," said Shimlathy. "And in case I can't find a real job I want to make sure I can hack it as a prostitute." As of press time Shimlathy was studying with another student, Kyle MacLuper, who is an expert in both Sociology and finding men who will sleep with Shimlathy for money.