WEST CAMPUS—Local man Robert King decided to use a moderately dirty fork last Wednesday, stating that the utensil was “pretty much clean.” Although King had proper cleaning supplies and plenty of free time to adequately wash the fork, he decided that it was sufficiently clean and proceeded to eat his bowl of Chef Boyardee ravioli. “I gave it a quick look, and after I flicked off a piece of shredded cheese that was stuck to the side [of the fork], I decided that we were good to go,” explained King as he licked the remaining tomato sauce from the lid of the can. “It’s not like I’m going to get AIDS or anything.” King has also come under fire in recent months for repeatedly wearing dirty underwear, which, according to King, “are good for several days if you don’t get too sweaty.”